Strategies and Resources in a Time of Tragedy

We continue to mourn with sadness the tragic event that took place at the Lapu Lapu Day celebrations in south Vancouver on Saturday night. A beautiful and vibrant day of cultural celebration ended with the senseless loss of at least 11 lives and many more people injured. We especially lift up members of the Filipino community, who are deeply impacted by the events of Saturday night. This morning we joined as a school community to remember, reflect, sing, and pray together. Afterwards, students were invited to seek support in the Counselling Centre or engage in prayer in our adoration chapel.

As parents, it can be hard to know how to reassure our young people when we ourselves are striving to process and make sense of these losses. Below are some strategies and resources from the CISVA, Ministry of Education, and Safer Schools Together.

 

Consider how you access news and how that may impact children nearby. Young children may not know how to make sense of the news they are seeing and can quickly become overwhelmed. Encourage your older child to rely on reputable news sources, and where possible limit their consumption and exposure to upsetting coverage.

 

It is important to have conversations, and model with your own behaviours, the additional traumatic impact for victims and families when upsetting images are re-circulated. We are respectfully suggesting that individuals do not watch, repost or share videos of the tragedy.

 

Our children and youth will look to us for cues on how to process this upsetting information. Acknowledging our own feelings gives children a model for how to express and process their strong emotions. It is normal to experience a range of emotions in response to such unsettling news.

 

It is important to note that the intensity of these feelings are going to be impacted by a family’s personal connections to the event, their history of loss and trauma, and degree of exposure to the traumatic content on social media.

 

Listen to your child’s concerns before offering any explanations. Give them an opportunity to voice their fears and ask age-appropriate open-ended questions. Ask what they may have heard and what that information means to them. You may uncover misconceptions and unfounded fears that need correcting. These questions will also help you understand if your child is coming from a place of curiosity, concern or fear, and will help you gain a sense of what your child may need from adults to feel safe and supported.

 

Some of the questions you can ask include the following:

 

Tell the truth but do it gently. Give your child facts as long as it is consistent with their stage of development and keep conversations age appropriate. Children need to know their concerns and questions are being taken seriously by the adults around them and that they can trust their adults to be truthful with them. If you don’t know the answer to a question, don’t be afraid to say so.

 

Maintaining daily routines can provide a sense of stability and security for children and adults. It can also be important to give children permission to continue to find and celebrate hope in their daily world.

 

Remind your child there may be others in their daily lives who may be impacted by this tragedy. Talk with your child about how we need to treat others with extra compassion and empathy during times like these. Tragedies and times of sadness and grief can serve as meaningful moments to teach compassion, which can help children feel empowered as they find additional ways to be kind and caring.

 

We recognize that our students may require additional support. We will continue to prioritize the mental health and well-being of our students. Be mindful of any changes in your child’s typical behavioural norms. If you feel your child needs additional support, please reach out to us and/or access the community supports identified in the following resources.

 

Resources

 

I would like to leave you with a message from Archbishop Miller to parishioners:

 

Dear brothers and sisters,

Today we mourn with deep sadness the tragic and senseless loss of life that took place last night at Vancouver’s Lapu-Lapu Festival. We grieve the deaths of 11 people and the suffering of so many others. We hold especially close our beloved Filipino community, who are a treasure to our parishes and to our city.

 

As we celebrate Divine Mercy Sunday, we are reminded that the Risen Christ is near to the wounded, the suffering, and the brokenhearted. We entrust the souls of the departed to his mercy and pray for comfort and healing for all those affected.

 

If you or someone you know is struggling in the aftermath of this tragedy, please reach out. Our diocese has information available about Catholic mental health counselors, and we can also help connect you with the Vancouver Police Department’s Victim Services Unit, which provides support to those impacted by violent events. Please contact me or the parish office for more information.

 

Let us continue to pray for the victims, for their families, and for peace in our community.